Oprah moment

Neotionery definition " the moment where you put down that third bag of pretzels and roll off the couch only to realise that you gained weight. Then going on to act suprised and say things like "how did I let this happen to me again" on the cover of your very own magazine" Please bear in mind that the Big O did not actually roll off the couch after a few too many pretzels but that would probably be something I did. So now like the Big O, I am trying to make it right with a bit of exercise and eating right (half a packet of Pretzels instead of 6). The exercise bit is not going too well coz I was lifting weights the other day and I now have a pain in my neck and somewhere on my chest. It hurts when I breathe. I was moaning about it to a colleague of mine and he says its coz im sooo unfit and he proceeded to hand me a running programme. No mercy I tell you (last time I invite him to my pitty party). There is nothing wrong with the programme, it is actually easy to follow but the only snag is that there are bloody pofadders rolling up and down the hills and I AM NOT ABOUT TO GO RUNNING AROUND IN SKIMPY SHORTS JUST SO I CAN GET MY LEGS BITTEN OFF AND LATER AMPUTATED AFTER I HAVE A RUN-IN WITH A POISONOUS POFADDER. Nah ah, so I have to work smart. Like running around the dining room table and then proceeding to do sit-ups (ouch) and what not, in front of the TV. The one thing I can learn from the Big O though, is that you don't wana spend ur udult life obssesing about your weight, it makes you a bore. The fact that you have enough money to talk about it on your tv show, CNN, ur own magazine and whatever else is available ...makes you more of a bore. The truth is we all know the secret to weight loss. Eating less and Exercise. There simple. The amount of energy we use to bitch and moan about our weight could actually be used to do a few more laps around the dining room table or even more lunges while watching an episode of Aljazeera. I know I don't want to wake up one day like the Big O did and say things like "I'm mad at myself. I'm embarrased. I can't believe that after all these years, I'm still talking about my weight." Not unless I have my own talk show anyway.

Addicted to Aljazeera

Warning : I am now going to spend the whole post writing about my love affair with a news channel (channel 406 to be exact) I'm so addicted that I am even considering being one of their war correspondents. We could always use more suicidal journos in the Middle East right? ok maybe not just yet. I may need my legs later on in life. I know why they say watching news is addictive. I'ts not just the news though, they have great programming. Like The Listening Post, which has to be my favourite. Where they look at the way the world media cover certain events like the Iraqi War, 9/11 or in today's episode, the CNBC network and how they misled viewers with their coverage of the "financial crisis" etc. It is always good to get a fresh perspective on the news of the day and Aljazeera does exactly that for me. They also have brillant documentaries. let us bear in mind that I was not much of a doccie buff till I had to take a class in "documentary scriptwriting" about 2 years ago. Besides Nanoek of the North being the first doccie ever made (or something along those lines) I have newly found appreciation for doccies now and that class I grudginly took. I sit through the Documentaries on the Middle East (Cold Peace which I sat through yesturday) with a huge smile on my face. They also have a nice one on South Africas biggest hospital, Baragwanath called "Saving Soweto"... I mean why can't the SABC news..okay let me not go there. Rather than looking at the Middle East as an oil rich, terrorist ridden hell-hole, they actually go in and at least try to get the whole story. I mean they were the only media organisations with cameras inside Gaza after the recent attacks, so at least (at least in my mind) they are more credible that a blithering journo from {insert fav news channel here} who is stuck at the border but is reporting on the thing like he is actually inside. ***end of rant****

Tired of the Agulhas Plain or just plain homesick

Yeah like you didn't see it coming? I have just about had enough of the bundus. It's almost a year since I moved to go live amongst the trees and all things natural and yeah I think that saying 'quit while you're ahead" springs to mind at this minute.That and the fact that one of my friends accused me of being a hippie today and the only answer I could come up with was "not necessarily". So I have decided that I need to move back to the city, although I still like the slower pace of Slaapstad, I might wana be back in Johazadousberg or even Pretoria, haven't decided yet. Although being a war correspondent for Aljazeera wouldn't be a bad option at all. Something about Aljazeera just makes me wana pack up my little suitcase and move to Doha. I almost did it once till I realised I couldn't even afford a bus-ticket to Paarl let alone a one-way ticket to Doha. The thing abour spending a while in the middle of nowhere is that it actually makes you weird, especially working in conservation. The people are too nice, it's so weird. Must be something about "saving the Earth" that guarantees that you stay bright and chirpy all day everyday. All this talk about "alien" (trees) and recycling has my friends thinking I am few slices short of a loaf. I even tried to convince a few guy friends that the soles of their sneakers can be recycled to make new basketball court. Obviously this is not the kind of thing you want to hear during a drinking session. But really enough is enough. I miss the bloody concrete jungle. I am homesick. But most of all I miss hanging out with my friends and going out and bitching about the traffic.. would you beleive? I actually miss being stuck in N1 traffic. Now that's crazy.

Snakes on the Plain

Im sure you already know where I am going with this. But really, what would the point of having a blog be, if I couldn't even state the obvious. I mean I am bored stiff, so u might as well indulge me as I whine about another week in the bundus on the Agulhas Plain.

A whole week has gone by and we have seen about 3 snakes, they are apparenly called "pofadders". I am a city girl so I can't be expected to remember how to spell all the names. It's hard enough coming to terms with the fact that fynbos is not a plant but a group of species. Information overload.

But what I don't get is why the people seem so shocked at the sight of these snakes. I mean we are living in the middle of nowhere, surely they have seen poisonous snakes before? But every time a snake has been "spotted" everything has to stop so we can give the poisonous thing our undevided attention. Last night I decided, an episode of Carte Blanche was more important that seeing a poisonous snake run accross the veld.

I mean, give the damned thing some privacy why don't you!

But the truth is I am scared of getting bitten. I like Snakes when they are far far away, on tv, at the Zoo etc. Having had a close look at the "pofadder" it looks kinda pretty, reminds me of a belt, maybe even shoes...

keeping time..

I was browsing through time magazine the other day. You know looking for interesting news so I can sound as smart as the rest of you during dull moments at a dinner party. But I ended up at the pictures section.

enjoy

travelling dilinquents..

I love my friends. I might call them dilinquents most of the time but that is my way of showing love or something that closely resembles it. They call me a dilinquent as well so I guess it's all good. Anyway, since we are all practically working our asses off for THE MAN. We came up with a brillant plan while drinking at a friends impromptu "farewell" the other day. The farewell really wasn't planned, we just crashed a friend's braai and decided as soon as we arrived that the theme for the braai would be our friends' farewell since he is joining me in the United States of helen Zille soon. So, we are chilling there at a braai and it never occurs to us that we actually need to be eating braaied (sp) meat for this gathering to be called a braai. We only ever thought about the food when it started to rain. But who needs food when u are in good company anyways.. Eventually we end up talking about a trip to Mozambique. Now anyone who has been exposed to me for more than is necessary will know that I have been planning to go to Moz since Jesus was in diapers. I am still planning but this time, with the added knowledge that the dilinquents want to join in. Therein lies the problem. I leave everything to the last minute and now I have been tasked to plan a trip for about 6 people. Where the hell do I hide and how the hell did I agree to this anywa? But on the other hand, it is bound to be an awesome trip so best I stop blogging about it and actually do some actual planning. PS: if you are reading this and actually know where I should start, please don't be shy to leave me a comment :)

I write lol and Im not even laughing

That is the name of this random group I joined on assbook the other day. Im one of those people who join groups that achieve absolutely nothing. But that is not the point of this post. The point of this post is that my use of emoticons is out of control and that I have way too much time on hands. The lol, lmao and smiley faces (that used to annoy the living daylights out of me in my past life) can now be found peppered all over my sms' and e-mails. This is a disease surely, but I am not sure if I am ready to be cured just yet...Which could only mean that I fall into the category of people who assume that it is important to inform others (the reader) when to laugh by inserting an emoticon... I mean since when is it safe to leave to decide for themseves when to laugh or not? They'll thank me one day for reminding them that I am laughing out loud while typing to them (at least that is what i would like to believe.Sometimes it is necessary to use then, especially to move the conversation along. Me: blah blah blah Friend: blah blah blah Me: OMG u so funny Friend: lmao Me: ha ha hahehehe :) you see the conversation lost its mojo and now we just using the emoticons and the lols to keep the conversation moving while we think up something else to say or find a reason to log off.